Telling the Boys

We’re going to have another baby! If all goes well, he or she will arrive in late March. We told Seamus and Gilbert on Wednesday night. We bribed them with apple pie a la mode to sit and be enthusiastic. Their reactions were classic.

They were headed out the door to play in the back yard when we told them. Seamus said, “Oh my God,” but he said it quietly, and a bit sheepishly when I asked him to repeat himself. Gilbert said, “Yay!” Then they wanted to know what the baby would be, a baby brother or a baby sister? We said we didn’t know. Gilbert started jumping up and down, “I want a baby sister!” Seamus just looked at us. We asked if they wanted to find out, or if they wanted to be surprised when the baby was born. They both said they wanted to be surprised, and then they went out the door.

I watched them playing and talking in the yard while the pie finished cooking. I would have loved to have heard what they were saying, but I think it’s good that they had their moment to discuss the event with each other more or less privately.

When we called them in for pie, they wanted to talk a little more. G: Is the baby already growing? (Answer, yes. G: But you’re not fat.) S: How do you tell if the baby is a boy or girl? Can you see it’s penis? We showed them some pictures from the 11-week ultrasound, and they were somewhat intrigued. They also decided they wanted to know if the baby was a boy or girl. We have until November 2nd to decide.

I left the room for a minute to go do something or get something, and Seamus said, to nobody in particular, “If we have another baby, nobody will have time to play with me.” Oof. I think he feels the attention acutely, but as Patrick pointed out, if the baby encourages Seamus to ask for the things he wants and needs, it will be a good thing. And he does get a lot of attention–we’ve been reading a complicated Lego Star Wars book, playing basketball and soccer, and listening to stories of first grade. Nobody ever gets enough attention from their parents. And yet, Seamus does seem to get the short end of it a lot. I’m going to try to do more with him.

This morning, they were a little gleeful thinking about Porter seeing the baby, and Gilbert (?–I think) said, “He’s going to think you don’t love him anymore, just like Seamus thought when he saw me!” Oh, dear. We have a long way to go.



  1. Remember Baby Jill? When I asked you what happened to Baby Jill (when Connie had a boy instead of the expected girl) you put your hands on your hips and said, “I don’t know, but they better not bring her in this house — we already got this one (Bret) and he’s a lot of trouble.” hahahah

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